SEDIH

So, it's confirmed. GAGAL. Memang dah jangka. Tapi tentulah harapan still lagi tinggi menggunung. Tapi u can never undo the past. I did it terribly. Sekadar mengharapkan miracle to happen without usaha, memang harapan tinggal harapan je lah. Oh, dan kekecewaan. Sekian.

Hari Raya Hamper

The management must have an agenda in their mind when out of the blue they decided to give the employees a hamper for this coming Hari Raya. After the massive contract workers retrenchment early this year and almost half pay cut for the operators, they distributes coupons for exchange with a hamper.

I admit that I am quite overjoyed when I received the FOOD hamper. I tore it as soon as I reached home. But the items were quite a disappointment though. Apart from most of it are just a big box with a much smaller contents, the brand are also very alien to me. Seriously, I have never seen that brand ever sold neither in hypermarket like Tesco nor a small grocery store near my house. Even if Carrefour selling it (they are the contractor) I bet you these brands sit at the lowest & farthest shelf!

Me - all fired up opening up the hamper :p

Anchovies snack.. well... :-/

I like this. I just can't stop munching.

This is a credit.. CADBURY!

The Belo choc.. yummy :)

A box of dates. Its 3 more days to Raya.

Banana chips..with wrong spelling of 'kelepek' instead of 'kerepek'!
And fish chips.

Then the 3-in-1 Teh Tarik.. And its not a Power Root.

House brand of Orange bottle & Pa'la brand lychee syrup..
never heard of, right?

It's not that I'm not grateful, all of these are edible anyways. But, do they seriously think we'd be happy with a basket of cheap foods in exchange of one third of our salary? Bummer!

So Long, M.J.

I was driving to work when I first heard of Michael Jackson's death. As everybody else, I couldn't believe my ears when Richard Reed (I seriously don't know his name) mentioned MJ's name on the Hitz.fm. His sudden and shocking departed has left the whole stunned.


The very first time I got to know MJ's songs was thru a relative. Of course I was very young at that time, maybe 8 or 9. That relative was a teenager, and his owned a hi-fi stereo, and I was in his room, so fascinated with the stereo and was trying very-very hard to resist the temptation to push the buttons. I listened to his songs, one after another until end of tape, and then thanks to the auto-played technology I got to listens to the second cassette.


That's how I came to know and immediately fall in love with his songs, and him :). And now, he is gone. I have to admit that he had been long gone from my current favourites, but today's news brought back the memories, and more importantly reminding world once again, that he IS Michael Jackson, the ultimate one and only, and will always be the one.


I'll be missing you, thank you for the emotion you've flooded my heart with your songs and performances. Moga Allah mencucuri rahmat atas rohmu. Al-Fatihah.

Hope and Frustration

Be careful of what you wish for...coz when it didn't turn out the way you expected, it can bring tears to the eyes. That's what happen to me earlier tonight. Me & E have been trying for a year now. So when my period is late for nearly a week, I've started putting hope, which I kept for myself. Coz if I tell E, he surely will advice me not to, fear I'll be hurt. Making it worse, I let my mind wandering, manipulating myself. Its like I can feel the joy, carrying my child inside of me, the joy I'd bring to our parents, up to the extend of re-scheduling upcoming trip (coz we'll be going to Sabah next month & Bandung in October). I calculated how months I'd be by then and whether I fit for the trip or not. 

So, when it's confirmed that we failed again this month, the tears came running. Which is not good. And proving E's advice is totally true. But I can't help it. And I don't want to lie to myself. 

Guess I need to re-check my hope and expectation. And to try harder next time!

Happy Birthday, Darling!

February each year means celebration. No, not because of Valentine's Day, but on the 12th, that is E's birthday and on the 16th, my sis, Kak Maya's birthday. So, E turned 30 this year... hmm, quite a number haha.. (dun get angry darling, I'll be joining you in a few months). I did a simple party at home. Since I don't cook,  I'd figured it's the best time to play the hostess, cook a few simple food and invite our families to come over. 

I don't want to cook white rice, because it means I need to cook the side dishes. So, to make things easy (for me, obviously) I cooked Pineapple Fried Rice with fried chicken. Clever, huh :). I fried some curry puff as well. And I bought cute little cuppacakes for dessert. 

The fathers

The mothers

I wanted E to feel special on his birthday this time. He turned 30, so I don't want him to get upset. I planned a surprised party with Rai. Lucky that she didn't have other plans. The plan is to meet up after we went to gym. So she came with Khairul, and Yana & Paez tagged along. 

We went out from gym and saw Khairul & Paez outside the Rainforest Bar, smoking. We chat a few minutes and they ask us to join them upstairs. E didn't suspected a thing! He came up, and greeted by the band singer, singing Happy Birthday. 

Then E being asked to do something. They ask him to stand on a beer barrel and do the strip dance. They actually ask him to take off his shirt! Oh, pity him, I didn't know that is how they celebrate birthday at this bar. E was sporting, dancing away to Crazy... what a crazy night...

Happy Birthday darling.. wishing you happy & success years ahead. Love u always..

Beautiful Things

Have you ever sitting alone, thinking of all the bad things people done to you, or happened to you? Well, I did that a lot. Yeah, that doesn't sound good. It's like surrounded by black cloud, and sometimes I did think "AM I GOTHIC or something?"

But often I awaken by something beautiful around me. Like a simple smile from a stranger. I remember on time, when I studied Matriculations in Penang, very far from my parents and sister, and I don't have any real friends nearby me. I was on my way back from KL, sitting alone in the ferry to Penang, torn in between going back to campus, or catch the first bus back to KL, when all of sudden, this Chinese girl who standing not far from me, looking at me and smile. It's just a simple smile, but it brought something to my heart. I could feel the sincerity, and I feel like I can embrace the warmth. That is one smile that I would never ever forget for the rest of my life.

Let me show you something beautiful & cute. The choc chips popped out after dipped in milk. Isn't it beautiful?

Sick

I am sick. I'm lying in bed, tearry eyes, very, VERY itchy nose, breath heavily.. Just drank diluted soluble water (is that correct? Soluble? Panadol made specially for cold fever). I can't think properly now.. Got to sleep... (sneezed, again...)

Not good feeling, not good, not good... And here comes the headache...